Romantic Shayari - Sad Shayari - Best Sher-o-Shayari Romantic Shayari, Sad Shayari, Bewafa Shayari, Filmi Shayri, Love Quotes, Best Quotes, Two Line Shayari....

Santa Aur Uska Beta Pappu Dono Ne Socha Ki Aaj Kisi Ka
Chutiya Kaat Te Hai Pappu Ne Phone Se Ek Number Milaya Aur Pucha:
“Kahan Ka Number Hai?” Jawab Aya: “Police Station
Ka.” Pappu: “Ap Ke Paas
Danda Hai?”

Inspector: “Haan Hai!” Pappu:
“To Use Apni Gaand Mein Dal
Lo” Aur Itna Kah Ke Phone Kaat Deta Hai
Inspector Ne Thodi Der Socha Aur Fir Gusse Se Us Number Pe Phone
Kiya Inspector: “Yaha Se Ek Phone Phone Aaya
Tha.” Santa:
“Fir?” Inspector:
“Mujh Se Puchha Aap Ke Pass Danda Hai. Maine Haan
Kaha To Usne Bola Gand Me Daal Lo.” Santa:
“Achha? Kitni Der Pehle Phone Aya
Thha?” Inspector: “Koi 10
Minutes Pahle” Santa: “To Fir Ab Nikaal
Lo“

Ek Taxi Driver Ne Teen Logo Ko Taxi Mein Bithaya Jisme 1 Ladka, 1 Ladki Aur 1 Hizda Tha.
Pahle Ladki Utari, Kiraya Dete Samay Driver Ne Ladki Ko 2 Rupaye Vapis Kar Diye

Ladki: “Mujhse 2 Rupaye Kam Kyun Liye?”
Driver: “Teri Gori Pyari Chut (Vagina), Uspe 2 Rupaye Ki Choot (Discount).”
Driver Ne Ladke Se 2 Rupaye Jyada Liye.
Ladka: “Oye, Mujhse 2 Rupaye Jyada Kyon Le Raha Hai?”
Driver: “Tera Kala Mota Lund, Uspar 2 Rupaye Ka Dand (Fine).”
Ab Hizda Ye Sab Sunkar Bina Paisi Diye Hi Bhagne Laga.
Driver: “Ruk Bhonshdi Ke Kiraya To Deta Ja.”
Hizda: “Na Mere Pas Chut Hai Na Hai Lund, Isliye Main Hun Free Fund.“

Ladka Ladki Akele Bethe Pyar Bhari Baatein Kar Rahe Thhe
Ladki Ne Bade Pyar Se Ladke Ko Kaha
Ladki: “Mujhe Na Aapke Chutkule (Jokes) Bade Achhe Lagte Hai.”

Ladka: “Haan Janu Mujhe Bhi Tumhari Chut Aur Kulhe Bade Pasand Hai“

Bipasha Aur John Ki Shadi Ke Baad Unhe Kala Bachcha Paida Hota Hai
John: “Main Bhi Gora Tu Bhi Gori Fir Bachha Kyu Kala?”

Bipasha: “Main Bhi Hot Tu Bhi Hot To Garmi Se Bachcha Jal Gaya Na“

Santa Pahli Baar Train Mein Reservation Karaane Ke Liye Gayaa
Santa Ne Reservation Form Me “Ling/Sex” Wale Column Me Likh Diya “8 Inch” Aur Form Submit Kar Diya.
Booking Window Par Clerk Lady Thi, Usne Ye Dekha Aur Boli

Lady Cleark: “Sir Ye Kya Hai, Isko Kaato, Ye Nahi Chalega”
Santa Hairani Se: “Kitna Kaat Doon?”
Lady Cleark: “Poora Hi Kaatna Padega”
Santa Ke Tote Udd Gaye: “Madam Ji Aap Reservation Cancel Hi Kar Do, Main Bus Se Hi Chala Jaaunga.“

Next Day Santa Ki Choti Beti Ne Santa Se Kaha: “Papa, Main Ma Ban Ne Wali Hu”
Santa Aag Baboola Ho Gaya Aur Gusse Se Bola: “Sali Kutti, Kahan Chudva Ke Aayi Ho, Kon Hai Vo Bhen Ka Loda, Tune To Pure Khandan Ki Ma Chudva Di.”

Ladki Fatafatt Boli: “Papa Pahle Puri Baat To Suno Lo, Main School Ke Natak Main Maa Ban Ne Wali Hu.“

Ak Baar Lift Mein Ak Aadmi Ka Haath Galti Se Ak Aurat Ke Boobs Par Lag Gaya.
Admi: “Agar Aap Ka Dil Aapke Boobs Ki Tarah Nazuk Hai To Aap Mujhe Maaf Kar Dena”

Aurat: “Agar Aap Ka Lund Aapke Haath Jitna Kadak Hai, To Mei Room No.202 Mein Thahri Hui Hoon.“

Santa Ko Apne Achhe Kam Ki Vajah Se Company Mein Pramotion Mili Aur Vo Manager Ban Gaya.
Usne Apni Patni Ko Ye Good News Is Tarike Se Sunayi

Santa: “Darling, Sunti Ho Aaj Raat Ko Tum Company Ke Manager Ke Saath Soyegi”
Biwi Khushi Ke Mare Uchhal Padi Aur Boli
Biwi: “Sachiiiii, Ye To Batao, Sharma Sir Ke Saath Ya Patel Sir Ke Saath“

Dosto Naya Saal Shuru Ho Gaya Hai.
Aur Is Naye Sal Ki Shuruat Hum Baba Saxidas Ke Updesh Se Karte Hai
Baba Saxidas Ka Kahna Hai Ki Girlfriend Chahe Jitni Bhi Chalu Kyu Na Ho Us Se Kabhi Relation Khatm Na Karo

Kyunki Paani Jitna Bhi Ganda Ho, Par Aag Bujane Ke Kaam To Aata Hi Hai

Ek Lady Market Jaane Ke Liye Ek Rikshaw Karti Hai
Rikshaw Thodi Door Jaata Hai Ki Ek Khadde Ki Vajah Se Rikshaw Ko Jatka Lagta Hai Aur Lady Bahar Girr Jaati Hai

Aur Uski Saadee Ulat Jaati Hai Aur Wo Nangi Ho Jaatee Hai Lekin Wo Turant Khadi Ho Jaatii Hai Aur Rikshaw Wale Ko Bolti Hai
Lady: “Dekhi Meri Furti”
Rikshaw Wala: “Haan Mam Saab Maine Hi Nahii Saare Bazaar Ne Dekhi Aapki Furti, Lekin Aap Ke Yahaan Ise Furti Kahte Honge, Hamaare Yahaan To Ise Fuddi (Choot) Kahte Hain.“

Ek din ek larki bolny wala tota kharidny gaee
Usne toty se pocha
Me tumhen k c lagti hon
“Randi lagti ho”
tota bola
Dukandar ne ghusy me usko pani me dubaya
or pocha
“gali dega?”
Tota bola
“Ab nahi donga”
Larki ne phir pocha
“Agar mery ghar 1 mard aye to tum kya sochogy?”
“Pati”
Aur agar 2 mard ayen?
“Pati or devar”
Or agar 3 mard ayen?
“Pati devar or bhai”
Or agar 4 mard ayen?
Tota ghusy me dukandar se “Mujhe dubade mene pehle hi kaha tha behen chod randi lagti he”

Ek ladki Doctor k pass gayi
Mary phuddi main makhi gus gaye hai
Doctor ny kaha k lund main shahed laga k undar dalonga makhi chipak k bahar ajaye gi
Doctor lund andar dal k zor zor sy jhatky marny lagta hai
Ladki: kya kr rahy ho
Doctor: Plan badal gaya hai makhi ko andar hi maronga.

Conductor: Baccha ka ticket

Rajasthani lady: iko bi lagego k? Yo to abhi BOBO chuse hai

Conductor: BOBO to iko baap bhi chuse hai ..tu uke bhi free me bithau ka

A man walks into his bedroom and sees his wife packing a suitcase. He says,"What are you doing?" She answers, "I`m moving to Las Vegas. I heard prostitutes there get paid $400 for doing what I do for you for free!" Later that night on her way out the wife walks into the bedroom and sees her husband packing his suitcase. When she asks him where he`s going, he replies... "I`m going to Vegas too. I want to see you live on $800 a year!"

Burford comes home from work and his wife is in the kitchen on all fours, wearing nothing but her bathrobe, scrubbing the kitchen floor. He comes up behind her, lifts up her robe, fucks her fast and hard doggie-style, and then smacks her in the head. "She screams, "Burford! I let you do something so nice like that! What`d you hit me for?" He says, "For not looking to see who it was!"